I should not be allowed online..

There are moments in my life I have a feeling, a dread in the pit of my stomach, a flash of insight into my brain and I realize, I should not be allowed online. I find things like the infamous Bonsai Kitty and pass it around. I point out how everyone would be happier with a Hat of Meat. The list goes on. Then there is a whole new category of the Why... http://www.sloganmaker.com/ But do I type in nice little names or sweet things? No, I do not. I have a list so far of things that have been fun to play with. Zombies, dead hookers, rodeo midget clowns... every single co-workers names. (those were highly amusing and everyone liked theirs heh) I find things like this... http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/ Which *really* comes in handy, especially funny when it makes someone stare blankly at you and then you can walk away giggling insanely to top it off. And it's these moments sitting here giggling and sharing what I come up with that I realize. Some moments in life I am just *not* right. Thankfully people love me anyways.

Roll that d20 for charisma!

That's it! I finally figured out why I never could get into D&D too much, they never had a deisgnation that fit *me*.

Chaotically cute sometimes evil mostly good but always warped is now my own special char designation. Think it will fly?

Thing is I am a solitary gamer so D&D never did fly my boat, I like RPG video games where I can play them at my own pace and can hit pause when the kids interupt. It just works better for me.

But I so want that title now, complete with attacks like "Uber cute puppy dog eyes" and "Adorable sayings that set you off guard and make you not notice the knife stabby thing" now that would just rock.

Ah what to do...

Maybe I need my own game so I can write all the rules and attacks, heh.

It's been a while...

So, it's been a while since I had a chance to sit down and write anything. Thankfully school has started, the work move is over, kids are settled down a bit and fall is coming. You can tell since it's only 92 outside and not 102. *snark*

There was a beautiful example of why I like it here in a random moment today. Sitting outside on the porch as I was yabbering at mom about the week so far and some of the things happening when I happened to look up. Rain had just started and was being blown sideways by high wind while the sun was setting, a break in the clouds let it shine and for a few long moments, it made the rain look like shooting daytime stars in abundance. I stared for a moment and chuckled with mom, "OooOooOoo double rainbow! Ohhh wow!" and then it went away.

Just wonderful!

I found out this morning the kitten has a hiss, it's the most pathetic smallest hiss in the world but he *had* to hiss today at the vet's cats that decided a fur swarm was called for on my lap as I was comforting the blood sucking baby cat after a blood draw. It was so cute, sickenly cute, adorably cute and yet, all the other cats just looked at him bored and stayed right where they were. Intimidation factor = Zero.

Wrapping up and getting dinner done.... I like fall and the slower pace.

Some of the odd ramblings of my brain...

I was talking on the phone with a friend, regaling her with funny little blurbs about the new kitten in my house, when something struck me.
Kittens are to cats what a new pot smoker is to an experienced one. Both of the young ones have all kinds of toys to play with, they lord over them, show them off and hide them oh so carefully from everybody they don't want to find them. When they get a bit of catnip they both like to secretly preen (or not so secretly) over it and horde it, saving it and savoring it, it's like you can see the thoughts in bubbles, "Oh! New stuff! This is *my* stuff! I will do this part now, save this for later, this one is for rolling around in and this one I will simply sniff for a while!"
Mature cats and pot smokers tend to have just one favorite toy and don't pay much attention to the new flashy ones. They also could give a fig less about playing with the stash, instead prefering to just do it and then walk away until they want more.
I am oddly tempted to name the kitten something very inappropriate because of this conversation though.

Zombies...

Yes, I am prepared in case of a zombie outbreak. I have supplies in the pantry closet, I have learned how to plyboard a window and I have an emergency escape route to the closest gun shop to avail myself of their firepower if needed. I know to avoid medical studies that have anything referencing a "T-Virus". I will not succumb to the zombie hordes, nevah!

However, I wasn't aware until I moved to Texas that zombies already exist. Really.

In the form of very disarmingly pretty dragonflies. The first large thunderstorm we had I went outside to watch, enjoy, make "Pew-pew!" noises at the sky..the basic *Double Thunderstorm Whoooaaa!* reaction to someone who hadn't lived in one in years.

After the light and sound show provided by the sky has stopped, I looked at my usually innocent tree branches. Normally they provide a little shade and mainly just leaves, but after tthe storm I saw this.



(Dragonfly may not really represent actual size. No, really.)


Seriously I sat there for a while going "Wow, big dragonfly."

Then, "Wait it's not moving!"

And, "well it's possibly dead"

But the dead dragonfly on the tree sat there for three days in what I thought was a partial discomposing state.
Three. Days. Without movement.

I wondered when it would dry up/fall off/break apart, I even debated using it as a feline tormenting tool (i.e. cat toy)with fond dreams of marketing it for use all over (Dead Thing on a String! Get your cat one today!). Then, as I watched, it came back to life!

I saw the wings move, slowly, the little dragonfly face turned towards me and in my *head* it looked like this...



Seriously, no joke, came back to a reanimated state and I swear for the next three days I kept peeking out there and seeing it. Each time with a more vacant stare and what appeared to be....brains.




The little bugger would *not* go, I swear I heard a tiny little bugvoice whispering, "Braaaaaaiiiinnnnnsssssss" each time I checked to see if it went away.

It went on for day, I kept calling a friend and going over the possibilities, could it get inside, was it simply there to freak me out and gain intelligence for the zombie dragonfly hordes, will it *ever* die?

One morning I went and and poof, it was gone, thankfully gone.

Then it hit me....all it did was move. Now I had no idea where the zombie dragonfly was.

So be careful, it's still out there. Somewhere.

On the list of most likely things

This will most likely wind up being an odd slice out my pie of life. Knowing myself well enough to understand that slice is like the first one out of the pan, kind of crumbling, mushy and dripping around the edges, a few cracks from trying to get it out nicely and having it completely fall into sections and then coated with ice cream and/or whipped cream to make sure it doesn't look to bad.

Ah, life, kids work and a warped sense of humor.

Now off to do the traditional hunting aisles of the store for food to bring home and roast over an electric stove.